Spaghetti Bolognese; Spaghetti served with a sauce of ground beef, tomato, onion, and herbs.

The past week has been pretty heavy on the ol' liver.... or kidneys??? I am not even sure what either of them ACTUALLY do. My VERY average grade C in GCSE Biology has not equipped me with such knowledge. 


The first 'heavy' night was Easter Sunday. We hardworking British were rewarded with an extra long Bank Holiday weekend. WAHEY! Consequently, my brother (right I do go out with other people just so you know..... sometimes) bought a number of Above & Beyond tickets, at Brixton Academy. 


For those of you NOT in the know - Above & Beyond are an English Trance music group formed in 2000 and consist of a the members Jono Grant, Tony McGuinness and Pavo Siljamaki.
Cheers Wikipedia - I may be a fan but I would never be able to retain or recall such specific info.


SO i figured we'd head out about 9.30/10 - grab a couple of drinks in Wimbledon and head to Brixton. NO NO NO my brother invited us round for a lovely Spaghetti Bolognese dinner (remember this...... it may or may not crop up later) and to commence drinking at 6pm.


Now, it being a Trance type night at Brixton Academy.... i knew this would not be an early 'in bed by 1.30am' finish. TECHNICALLY Above & Beyond's set was supposed to end at 4am... HOWEVER... every artist in the world over-runs. And then there is the matter of stumbling your way out of Brixton Academy amongst the cascades of minced people, THEN you have to physically get yourself home - not my forte as we all know. 


We are all eating dinner at dans, having some nice Vodka mixers - I quite 'wisely' decided not to start the night with  wine.
"RIGHT... WE'RE LEAVINGGGGGG"
7pm - glug down the rest of my Vodka & Bitter lemon, say farewell to the dogs and rush out the door. 
8pm - thanks to some hideous South West London Train engineering works over the weekend it took us an HOUR to get to Wimbledon. Hello Suburban my old friend - JUST slipped in before Happy Hour ended. YES. 
After a large chunk of drinking and shots of Cafe Patron (SERIOUSLY, try it!!!!) we move down the road to Pod Bar for more drinking.


Finally got to Brixton to watch Sander Van Doorn and Above & Beyond. 

It.got.messy. By the end I was pretty much A STATE. 


Having seen my state...... my brother STILL thinks we should go with the nightbus option home. DAMMIT he's usually such a reliable Taxi taker. 


We sit at the front of the top deck. OH FUCK A DUCK. I realise that if i open my mouth right now a little more than words will come out.
A little while in to the journey, the urge becomes too strong. I quietly advise the guy sitting next to me to move. He is a friend thank god.... a stranger may have thought I was mental.... they'd probably be right.
"DANNNNNNN you sister is about to chuck." - Blabber mouth!!!
ANDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD SPLATTER. 
BRIGHT orange bolognese came HURLING out of my mouth onto the bus floor and my hands which got unpleasantly drenched. My brothers girlfriend had to drag my long, pukey hair back out of the way whilst the vomit came up in waves of continuous humiliation. 
My brother then alerts me to the LOVELY orange streak of bile smudged across my face. I just gagged slightly.


We got off the bus at Clapham Junction.... i THINK. I just spent about 5 minutes trying to remember how we actually got home after Vomitgate.
AGAIN we sat at the front of the top deck. WHYYYYYYYYYYYY?????!!!!! The friend next to me decides to crack open a bottle of beer. Oh.HOLY.CRAP you bastard!!!!! I get the urge building in my throat once again and tell him to get out of the way .......... AGAIN.
Luckily, it seems I had nothing left in me to give. 
We arrive in Wimbledon. 
"Urgggggghhh Dan, how are we getting home from here?" 
"we are staying on the bus to Kingston Rach and then walking home" 
"I have to get off. I can't do it. Please can we get a taxi, please"


Arrive at the Taxi rank. "Next taxi will be available in half an hour"
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. I refuse to believe that!!!!!!!


After more attempting to be sick and lots of sitting around with cracked lips and a smelly puke hand we finally bag a taxi.


With a severe amount of concentration I manage to keep it together until my brother's road. The Taxi starts to slow.... I open the door and run over to the curb. After some serious convulsing I walk down to Dan's house. He throws open the door and i leg it to the bathroom. 
Looks like the Spaghetti part of the spagbol was deciding to make an appearance at this point. Yeahhhhhhhhhhhhh enjoy that nice image right there!!

Just FYI.... a couple of days later I was having dinner with my chum Jemma - deciding what to cook and she (unknowlingly) suggests "Spaghetti Bolognese". My Stomach turned. I may have ruined that meal forever.